Lawyer Jokes
Warning: Possible Adult Themes!
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HALL of FAME
Valerie
The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified man..."May I help you?" she asked.
"I want to see Valerie," the man replied.
Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $1,000 a visit.
Without hesitation, the man pulled out ten one-hundred dollar bills, gave them to Valerie,
and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left.
The next night, the same man appeared again, demanding to see Valerie.
Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie and they went upstairs.
After an hour, he left.
The following night the man was there again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for
the third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs.
After their session, Valerie questioned the man. "No one has ever been with me three nights in a row.
Where are you from?" she asked.
The man replied, "South Carolina."
"Really" she said.
"I have family in South Carolina."
"I know," the man said. "Your father died, and I am your sister's
attorney. She asked me to give you your $3,000 inheritance."
The moral of the story is that there are three things in life that are certain:
1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Being screwed by a lawyer
The proposition
The Devil said to the lawyer, "I have a proposition for you.
You can win every case you try, for the rest of your life.
Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in
awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money.
All I want in exchange is your soul, your wife's soul, your
children's souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents,
and parents-in-law, and the souls of all of your friends
and I want to have anal sex with your 14 year old daughter."
The lawyer thought about this for a moment, then asked,
"So, what's the catch?"
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